Author: Rita Schoeman

Self-Compassion Creates Safety — First Internally, Then Externally We cannot offer others a sense of safety if our own inner world feels unsafe. When you criticise yourself severely, demand perfection, or reject your mistakes, you foster an internal atmosphere of fear. And leaders subconsciously transmit this environment to their teams. A leader who is at…

We live in a world obsessed with rapid change. Social media shows us dramatic before-and-after moments, “10x productivity” hacks, and overnight success stories. It is no surprise that many of us feel pressured to change quickly, visibly, and perfectly. But real growth rarely happens in the spotlight. From my own inner work, through coaching, the…

There’s a saying that has echoed in my mind for years:“Projection makes perception.” It means that what we see “out there” in the world is shaped by what we believe “in here” — within ourselves. This truth isn’t just psychological theory; it’s something I’ve observed repeatedly in my own life and in my clients’ lives….

As a leadership coach, I often hear people say, “I can’t afford to invest in myself right now.” Yet, upon closer inspection, I notice how much they unconsciously spend on things that offer temporary comfort, validation, or distraction. Low self-esteem quietly drains both your confidence and your bank account. It doesn’t always manifest as reckless…

As a leadership coach, I’ve noticed that one of the most subtle yet powerful themes in people’s lives, including my own, is the longing for approval. It assumes many forms: perfectionism, over-achievement, people-pleasing, constant performance, or a quiet fear of disappointing others. It may seem like you’re always saying yes when your whole being wants…

When I reflect on Chapter 34 of The Pearl Beyond Price, Aloneness, I feel that A.H. Almaas touches something very tender and very challenging in the human experience. Most of us are afraid of being alone. In fact, much of our ego structure is built to avoid exactly that feeling. We seek connection, recognition, and…

Not long ago, I had a seemingly ordinary exchange with my brother while trying to figure out a six-digit password. I only managed to catch the first four digits, and when I said, “It doesn’t fit,” he replied simply: “You must listen.” And in that moment, I didn’t just hear my brother; I listened to…

As a leadership coach, one of the questions I hear most often is: “How do I stop self-sabotaging patterns?” It’s asked with a mix of urgency and hope, as though there might be a simple answer, a quick fix that can break years of entrenched habits. I wish I could tell you there was such…

As a leadership coach, I am often asked the same set of questions, sometimes quietly, sometimes urgently, often with the underlying hope that I can provide the “golden key” to unlock an easier life: How do I reinvent myself?How do I reset myself?How do I live my full potential? These questions are profoundly human. They…

I sit with this question:Can I live from Being even if Ego feels small? It came like a whisper while reading The Pearl Beyond Price by A.H. Almaas. But it stayed with me as a thunder in my heart. Loud. Restless. Demanding my full attention. And I think this is the question behind many of…

Many people in today’s work environment view stress as part of being ambitious. We often encourage hard work, celebrate long hours, and accept burnout as normal. But what if stress is not something to take pride in? What if it is actually a quiet signal that something within us is not quite right? As a…

Have you ever found yourself reacting at work in a way that felt automatic, perhaps even contrary to how you wish to present yourself? Maybe you say yes when you meant no or withdraw when you yearn to speak up. These subtle behaviours often go unnoticed, yet they shape our culture and reflect a deeper…

In today’s fast-paced, high-pressure business environment, workplace harmony is often overlooked as a “soft” concept, nice to have, but not essential. Yet, research and lived experience consistently show that team harmony is desirable and mission-critical. It fuels productivity, strengthens retention, and ignites innovation. More importantly, it creates the psychological safety and emotional resilience needed to…

Reading The Void: Inner Spaciousness and Ego Structure by A.H. Almaas has been a very personal and enlightening experience. There is one part that hit me hard and brought unexpected anxiety: “We have demonstrated that ego psychology, or what is specifically called object relations theory, contains the understanding of how the psychic structure is carved…

Happiness Breeds Success Happiness Breeds Success: The Underrated Pathway to Achieving Your Dreams In today’s fast-paced and competitive world, the pursuit of success often feels like an uphill battle fraught with stress and sacrifices. The conventional wisdom tells us that hard work, relentless ambition, and a willingness to make personal sacrifices are the keys to…

Self-reflection drives success In today’s fast-paced world, the relentless pursuit of success often leaves little room for self-examination. We’re constantly on the move—juggling deadlines, meeting expectations, and chasing ambitious goals. Yet, amidst all the hustle, we seldom pause to ask ourselves whether we are on the right track, both personally and professionally. Enter self-reflection: an…

Self-leadership—an underestimated skill Self-leadership is an essential skill for anyone looking to be successful. It involves being able to motivate and guide oneself in order to set a positive example for those around you. By mastering self-leadership, individuals can improve their decision-making skills, enhance their emotional intelligence, and develop a strong sense of self-awareness. This…

Empowering Phrases to Combat Gaslighting Using these 3 jaw-dropping and powerful phrases you can end gaslighting in its tracks. Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic aimed at undermining someone’s reality, and can leave victims feeling confused, invalidated, and powerless. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll delve into the top phrases that shut down gaslighting, equipping you with…